What If?

20 12 2016

We ask ourselves questions all the time. Most of these questions start with the word WHAT.

What If?

What If?

“What should I wear today?”

“What should I say when asked a question?”

“What should I eat?”

We also ask ourselves, “WHAT IF?”

This often leads us to a series of memories that plant us right in the past regretting something we did leading to feelings of inadequacy or shame. I find that the questions that we ask ourselves inevitably shape our perception, perspective and framework for experiencing life.

Questions aim our thinking, awareness and focus.

This morning, while doing my daily journaling, I decided to RIFT off of the the question “WHAT IF?” However, the substance of my “what if” was much different.

Here are some examples:

What if my fears are unfounded?

What if 10 seconds of courage in a relationship could transform it forever?

What if my beliefs about myself are mistaken?

What if my assumptions are unfounded?

These were just a couple of WHAT IF questions I posed to myself.

As I immersed myself in this wonderfully inspiring series of WHAT IF questions, I literally felt my energy, creativity and world of possibility open up. I found myself in the mental amusement park of possibility.

As I came out of the journaling session I couldn’t help but wonder… WHAT IF everyone could begin to see their lives through a powerfully constructed “WHAT IF?” What if we were surrounded by a community of WHAT IF people? What if a simple blog could challenge just one person to pose this question in a new and inspiring way?

Maybe you are currently experiencing a significant challenge yourself. “What if” you could see yourself with greater courage, strength, skills, or support? “What if” despite past experiences you could see yourself rising above your past and transform your life by cultivating a new perspective never before experienced? “What if” on this day, in this season, we all could take a couple of minutes a day and pose this question believing we have been given the gift of free will and the creative capacity and imagination to ask ourselves “WHAT IF?!!”

What is your “WHAT IF?”

Let me know in the comments below.

Merry Christmas,

Shaun





The Challenge is Real

14 12 2016

Many people I care about and love are in the midst of significant life challenges! You might be one of those in the midst of a significant challenge.

TheseThe Challenge Is Real challenges could be best described as “being in a war.” The challenge never seems to let up. No matter which way you turn, there it is seemingly waiting to torment and therefore, torture you. It is said that when we face challenges of this intensity we come face to face with our true self.

I have to be honest and admit that the intensity of some of the challenges I am seeing go beyond a “problem to be solved.” Truthfully, a problem would be far preferred than a challenge. Problems can often be solved through advanced thinking, surrender and increased support. Challenges seem to dig at our humanity, value system, spirituality, and in some cases, our very existence. They force us to quickly assess our emotional, social, spiritual, and at times, financial resources.

How are we to respond when faced with a challenge(s) of this magnitude?

Whatever threatens our health, well being, family, security, and certainty is a real challenge. When life is at its best the strength of these arenas allow us to LIVE WITH DAILY CONTENTMENT. Once they are threatened then our life feels like it us under attack.

A bad doctors report puts the vision for tomorrow in question.

The loss of a job brings deep uncertainty of how to cover our financial responsibilities.

When one of our children or another loved one is struggling we are often faced with fear about what might happen.

Suffice it to say any of our lives could come under attack at anytime and without warning.

These challenges are REAL. They Require Encouragement And Love. (REAL)

CHALLENGES that shake us at our foundation demand the ASSEMBLING of an ARMY. No one goes to battle intelligently without an army. Armies have one thing they focus on…WINNING THE BATTLE.

We all need an army! A group of people that stand with us, fight for us and, without hesitation, go to war on our behalf.

What troubles me are the battles that people are fighting without their own personal army.

Armies compound courage in one another. BEING IN THE FIGHT WITH SOMEONE ELSE HELPS US TO FIND HOPE, COURAGE, STRENGTH, and FAITH IN THE BATTLE. Some of the challenges we face do not have any quick and certain answers. Maybe, the presence of a challenge forces us to GET OUTSIDE OF OURSELVES and LEAN INTO OTHER SOLDIERS borrowing their strength, hope and courage even if just for a season.

To those of you under attack because of a seemingly insurmountable challenge, I URGE YOU TO ASSEMBLE YOUR ARMY.

Many challenges appear to have no answers even though we chase answers with diligence and often desperation.

THE ARMY IS THE ANSWER!!

Don’t go it alone,

Shaun





What is Your Aroma?

6 10 2016

aromapostI attended my first teen support group about 30 years ago. I remember that night like it was yesterday. My first encounter was with a 15 year old that asked, “What the ******** are you doing here?” To which I honestly had no good response. To be honest, as a recent college graduate I believed that I had answers to the problems that many teens were experiencing at the time. I was there to share wisdom and provide a pathway to better living for those that were lucky enough to listen to my counsel. (I now realize how misguided I was)

This is where MY education began!

For the next 6 months I listened to young people talk about family breakdown, drug abuse, suicide, school failure, rejection, depression, hopelessness, and deep discouragement to name just a few. I realized that my answers were weak and unwanted, not because they were without merit, but because my presence reeked of superiority and judgement. I certainly did not intend this, but in retrospect, I understand.

You see my first encounter was a test. The test was, are you here to PROVIDE an ANSWER or are you here to BECOME PART OF THE ANSWER? Becoming part of the answer meant LISTENING INTENSELY before offering a solution. It meant truly seeking to understand before being understood. It meant EARNING through commitment and consistency the influence to MATTER over the long haul . After thousands and thousands of hours engaging in deep, honest, courageous, and vulnerable conversations, now 30 years later, I realize that the aroma that I brought to that first meeting had a distinct smell.

That smell was the aroma of LET DOWN.

Why? Because, providing answers and solutions to complex challenges without immersing myself in learning the learner has the smell of superiority and smugness.

This is often the aroma we bring when we want to solve heart-felt hurt, fear and desperation with simple cliches.

The truth is this AROMA is ALL OVER THE PLACE.

My presence and mindset that first meeting would have lead to nothing but more hurt, disappointment and LET DOWN to those I was with. The memory of my first years and what I have learned is one of the greatest gifts I have received in my life professionally and personally.

Here are three distinct POWERFUL PRINCIPLES that I have learned that I believe can guide you to better relationships, team work, personal success, and fulfillment.

People are wired to want and thrive from knowing that they are not ALONE. The disappointments, fears, failures, hurts, and unrealized hopes are best endured and healed through the unconditional presence of a loving person that simply seeks to walk in these moments WITH PEOPLE. Providing answers pales in comparison to being fully present. It took a group of teenagers to teach me the power of this principle. Many feel isolated, alone, and inferior without the relational experience of knowing they are not alone.

Practical help is the by product of deep listening and empathy. When we truly seek to understand the dreams, disappointments, and struggles the practical solutions become more clear. We often under estimate the power of UNDERSTANDING where one is coming from. This requires patience, curiosity, courage, and consistency. When this happens people grow wings of freedom and belief. When we take the time to LEARN THE LEARNER we become a powerful force for COURAGEOUS EXPRESSION and FREEDOM.

The aroma of our heart surpasses the wisdom of our words. Simply stated, “People do not care how much we know until they know how much we care.” This is a mantra for living, working and competing. I learned that everyday I am being vetted according to this principle and so are you.

When we are willing to BECOME part of the solution for others and serve them in this capacity we become forces of positive influence.

I want to humbly challenge us to change the aroma of our hearts by courageously investing in those around us. Lets see ourselves, not so much our solutions and wisdom, as part of the formula that unleashes FULL and FREE expression of those around us. Think of the untapped potential that could be realized if everyone had this in their lives.

Thirty years ago a group of 15 year olds taught me what was required and needed to truly become a force for growth and optimal expression of self. My hope is this blog can do the same for you!





Meeting the Confidence Challenge

17 08 2016

Who of us would not want a deep, bold and stable confidence?stencil.instagram-ad-original

Unfortunately, to many people the thought of possessing this type of confidence left long ago. It could be that a significant relationship with a coach, teacher, parent or friend sabotaged that dream. As a result we often tolerate, make excuses and position our lives to insure that we protect ourselves from a sense of failure or discouragement in order to never deal with our utter and complete lack of confidence.

For these reasons this is the day I invite you to engage in the CONFIDENCE CHALLENGE!

Simply stated I want to challenge you to PURSUE a more powerful and sustainable confidence.

For over 18 years I have been coaching thousands of athletes and without question when I ask, “What is the one thing you want to work on?” the response 90 percent of the time is “More CONFIDENCE!”

WHY ARE SO MANY OF US LACKING CONFIDENCE?

ANSWER

Because so many of us are TRADING COMFORT for CONFIDENCE.

It seems that comfort has become the desired lifestyle pursuit for many.

However, this trade is coming at a GREAT PRICE. The price is our CONFIDENCE IN OUR CAPACITY TO CREATIVELY and RESOURCEFULLY lean into challenges, obstacles, adversity, and uncertainty and learn of our untapped CAPACITY. If we are to establish and strengthen a DEEP ABIDING BELIEF in ourselves we MUST NOT ONLY MEET THESE CHALLENGES BUT EMBRACE THEM. There are not enough AFFIRMATIONS, POSITIVE THOUGHTS or WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT from others that can match the deep belief that forms when we FACE and grow through these natural life challenges.

The fear of failure is epidemic in today’s society.

Many of us parents get anxious about the possibility of our kids failing, so much so, that we put up barriers in the form of making excuses, nagging and over compensating to insure they WILL NOT EXPERIENCE FAILURE. This pattern robs young people the platform to embrace challenge, work through struggle and construct the framework for TRUE and ABIDING CONFIDENCE.

RESULT:

A COMPLETE AND UTTER LACK OF INTERNAL RESOURCES AND SKILLS TO MANAGE THE VERY ELEMENTS THAT WILL RESULT IN CONFIDENCE.

This is a challenge to embrace. Joyfully engage in the big and small challenges that life brings your way daily. The challenge of generating the motivation to get a workout in, to courageously put words to your experiences or simply give your best to something all while letting go of the FEAR OF FAILING will result in growing confidence.

When the possibility of disappointment, discouragement and failure exists this is where your greatest opportunity to learn and grow also exists.

Lets stop choosing the path of least resistance and start choosing the paths of GREATEST POSSIBILITIES. This is where the true treasure of deeply embedded confidence is found.

EMBRACE THE CONFIDENCE CHALLENGE TODAY!

Let us know your confidence challenges in the comments below!

You can find more resources at ShaunGoodsell.com





Breaking The Distraction Chains

8 08 2016

Have you ever given thought to the connection between ATTENTIVE CONSISTENCY and SUCCESS?stencil.facebook-ad-link

What I mean by ATTENTIVE CONSISTENCY is the continual capacity to give quality focus and concentration to a pre-determined priority; gaining a deeper and deeper understanding with each days focus. This is very similar to immersing yourself for a period of time in something you have a deep passion for or has significance to you. Examples of ATTENTIVE CONSISTENCY could include a relationship, hobby, business, sport, or even yourself.

But there is a problem.

I believe many of us are missing out on the deep joy and sense of fulfillment that accompanies the capacity to fully engage in and consistently focus on important priorities. We are often lured away from this type of experience because of multiple distractions. I define a distraction as anything that interrupts the flow of our attention.

Ask yourself this question: What is the length of time I can give quality focus and concentration to a pre-determined priority without being internally or externally interrupted?

How do we BREAK THE STRONG CHAINS OF DISTRACTION? How do we train ourselves to experience times of flow where we sustain our focus more often and with greater endurance?

Before I give some thoughts on this topic I want to say that there are many that have attentional challenges. The thoughts I want to put forth place no judgement on those attentional challenges or the means in which they are managing them.

First, I want to say that there are (3) distraction busters that have served me extremely well. None of these are quick fixes but if practiced consistently can strengthen our capacity to focus immensely over time.

1. Meditation: Until recently, I would not have included this because I had no experience with this practice. It seemed a bit “cheesy” to be honest. However, I decided I was going to build an internal library of EXPERIENCE rather than uneducated opinion. I was pleasantly enlightened by the results I found when I took just 10 minutes to quiet myself and my mind. Initially I found it difficult to SLOW DOWN enough to even get through a meditation session without immense distraction. Over time, I have found myself with incredible capacity to stay centered and calm despite a whirlwind of chaos around me. I am sold on the benefits of this practice. HEADSPACE is the app I use and the TAKE 10 challenge is very helpful.

2. Journaling: I have found writing to be incredibly helpful for taking internal confusion and producing crystal clarity. Sound helpful tips: In the morning identify **one word** that defines the way you want to “show up” in the world. Write a paragraph as to why, allowing yourself only 5 minutes to write. This is a great way to start your day. Another tip is to pose a question to yourself at the end of the day, What challenged me today? What did I learn? Again take 5-10 minutes to write. Most people get overwhelmed by the thought of writing pages and pages. This is unnecessary in my opinion.

3. Exercise: The benefits to being active are too numerous to count. Needless to say when we stay active we are able to fuel our minds with what it needs to focus. It is important that you know that I am not necessarily talking about the WORKOUTS of athletes, although they are helpful as well. Going on a 30 minute walk, moving around the house in between tasks is also helpful. JUST DO NOT SIT FOR TOO LONG WITHOUT MOVING.

DISTRACTIONS are blinding! They entice us to pay attention to information that is of little to no long term value. Those of us that are CONSTANTLY CHASING THE LATEST SHORT TERM FAD are often lacking the ability to track the life stories of those closest to them leaving the relationship bankrupt of deep connection.

IF you are looking to be enlightened with the wonder of strengthened focus and concentration make a commitment to one of the three DISTRACTION BUSTERS above.

Post your most common distractions in the comments below and which of the distraction busters you are going to implement today!





Dealing with Doubt

12 05 2016

Have you ever been getting ready to do something that you have prepared for only to find yourself overwhelmed with doubt? It could be a test you have studied for, a game you have marked on your calendar as significant, a tryout that will determine your next opportunity, or a meeting you have coming up that might open some doors for you.

These types of situations can all spark doubt.

WE ALL HAVE MOMENTS OF DOUBT.

However, doubt doesn’t have to derail you! In fact, when you experience doubt it is your CUE and SIGNAL to tune into or cultivate a NEW SELF TALK. What is self talk? It is the dialogue we cultivate within ourselves. The nature and coding of this conversation can either fuel us with COURAGE, PEACE, JOY, or DOUBT, DESPAIR, FEAR to name a few.

If we are going to OVERCOME DOUBT we need to speak to ourselves differently, not just once but ALL THE TIME.

Here is an example:

Recently I was preparing to shoot some training videos. Being in front of the camera has often brought about the self talk of “I am not good at this!” or “What right do I have to put something on video?” I end up DOUBTING MYSELF. The more I engage in this internal conversation, the more the doubt intensifies. Up until recently it has paralyzed me from even pursuing videos for the last 5 years.

When I was aware of this self talk I CHANGED it by saying, “I do not have to be perfect at this,” and “I will do my best and see where it takes me.” The more I engaged in that type of self talk the more I began to calm down and let go of the need to have it go a certain way. Doing this allowed me to ENJOY THE CHALLENGE and the LEARNING that the experience brought my direction. The funny thing is that where there was doubt at one point led to PRIDE, ENERGY and CONFIDENCE because of the EXPERIENCE.

I have learned that often my doubt is more about me than about what it is I am doing. I have had many experiences that have gone so much different than I thought they would (for the better). People have been more gracious, generous and accepting than I would have ever imagined.

If you will talk to yourself differently I believe with all my being that you will access COURAGE and ACTION where there has been doubt.

YOU CAN OVERCOME YOUR DOUBT!

Start today by learning a new SELF TALK CODE.

To help you get started go ahead and schedule a High Performance Coaching Strategy Session with me today. This coaching session is a powerful spark to anyone that is looking to aim their life in a different direction. Click here for the 411 and I’ll talk to you soon on your High Performance Coaching Strategy Session!

Until then,

Shaun

BONUS: Listen now to our latest Edge Talk with Shaun and Luke.  Luke will take you on his amazing journey of Overcoming Doubt.  Enjoy!





A Mental Edge Unsung Hero!

29 02 2016

After our latest post, we received this AMAZING response from one of our own Unsung Heroes of the Mental Edge!

Shaun,

Sitting here studying, I stumbled across your email from the Mental Edge on the subject matter of Unsung Heroes. I couldn’t help but to send an email saying thank you, give a players perspective, and share what I have learned from YOU and many others. This article sparked something within me and I hope my experience and those experiences of everyone else who has been in this same situation can help those struggling with their coaches, sports, and themselves.

This is the first time I have legitimately sat down to take what I know now and apply it to when I was in this very situation while skating for Saint Thomas Academy.

Playing for Saint Thomas, like every other team, was a battle. The process was physically tiring but more importantly Mentally Draining. The body heals overnight. The mind however, takes much longer.

There was so much pressure from coaches to perform and there was even more pressure from myself. Pressure to fulfill dreams I have had since I was a kid and pressure to perform at such a high standard. When things didn’t go my way I turned my blame to my coaches. I asked myself “why me?” Or, “I work harder than him and yet coach plays him over me?”

The line changes every week (mental games as I saw them) and not seeing the results I had hoped for left me broken. I let myself become a victim and blamed the coaches. I fell into this mindset of since I wasn’t scoring goals or skating on the first line that I didn’t matter. I saw opportunities as another chance for the coaches to take something away from me.

I was mentally broken when I came to you that very first day when we met in Minnetonka at the Caribou or Starbucks. I wanted to quit hockey. It was doing more harm than good at the time. I blamed others for not seeing the results I wanted to see. I blamed the coaches for not giving me chances to prove myself.

I emerged from that meeting, and the many more to come after that, with a new mission and mentality. I no longer thought as a victim but a victor instead. I realized I was to blame. I didn’t need chances to prove myself. I already did that on tryout day. I was not seeing the results I wanted to see because I was looking in the wrong place and with the wrong attitude.

I returned senior year with a clear vision of what I was working towards. I set the politics of sports aside and made sure that when my name eventually got called I was going to do everything I could to make the most of it.

I wasn’t the best and I didn’t get the most playing time. I sat nearly the whole game sometimes before getting my first shift. Some games I never even saw the ice. Is it fair? Absolutely not, but I did not care. All I cared about was making something happen when that chance finally did come. I started to create opportunities for myself instead of waiting for them to come to me.

The unsung hero isn’t just about playing a game. After all that is all sports are, a game. Some will go on, many won’t. The life lessons learned are what is most valuable.

The unsung hero is also about what goes on while not playing in the game. Taking new players under their wing and making them feel as if they matter. Creating a fun atmosphere in such a tense environment. Watching out for others. Being the one to give good positive feedback when the coaches fail to do so. Being happy for teammates who are doing well while you remain on the bench waiting eagerly for your chance to get out there and shine. However, the moment the name of an unsung hero gets called, a switch is flipped and something is going to happen that will change the game for the better.

The unsung hero is a weapon, but only when he or she realizes the fact they do matter and have more power over the team than those actually in the spotlight.

That is why people like John Scott draw so much attention. His name was finally called, doesn’t matter how, and he made the most of it. His smile was infectious to those around him on the ice and he set a new standard for the future All-Star Game Weekends.

The principles you have taught me have changed my life for forever. I was lost when I came to you and you helped me find myself and all that I am capable of. You saw it when I didn’t and told me what I needed to hear. You told me I was destined for more than chasing a game and lifestyle that I had no business being in any longer. You have helped me develop a mentality that has allowed me to excel in many areas of my life. I will forever be grateful.

Keep changing the lives of everyone you encounter Shaun. I strive to do the same!

Sincerely,

Jake Geiser